Pink or Blue

You guys, how cute is this cake?! 

Peter and I decided that when it was time to find out the sex of our little bean, we didn't want to do it alone. We wanted to share the special moment with our closest family members. They are almost equally as invested in baby and would make it just that much more exciting. 

So we gathered together with our immediate family, some cake and coffee. My sister who is currently being a #boss in France was even present on Skype! I've included a video from Peters Vlog where you can see the result, below!

Can you see the surprise on my face? Because I was 100% POSITIVE it was a boy, so much for mothers intuition!

As you can tell we were both pretty tired by the end of it, but it was a lovely, fun and special day for both us, and I love that we will have all of this to eventually show our little girl. 

As I mentioned in my last post, I've been writing some letters to (her)  almost every week and will share a few bits snd pieces with you here. Since these are still from the early weeks of the pregnancy - there are a lot of grumpy morning sickness rants! Sorry about that. 

6 weeks

Dear Baby Bean, 

One day earlier this week, I was looking in the mirror, admiring my still flat belly, blissfully unaware of the bloating and nausea that would hit me like a truck the next day. 

I was hoping that like some other people I know, I would breeze along the first trimester without too much discomfort. Maybe a few cramps, a few aversions, some cravings and call it a day! But then I woke up and I tried to have eggs.

I never realized how disgusting they were. I mean the texture, the colour, the smell - all kinds of gross! I can't even write about the E word without gagging. But the nausea doesn't end there. No  it sort of mildly lurks, sometimes the whole day, sometimes only part of the day, sometimes it goes away completely and I have a glimpse at what normal life is like. 

I feel guilty for complaining though Bean. Because if the option came between not having morning sickness or not having you. Well I'd get a years supply of crackers and some warm blankets in the bathroom. But I'm also afraid that this "magical" time in life, isn't going to be quite as pleasant for me as I had hoped. It's still early though. I am grateful that I have had progressing symptoms this time, that I know something is cooking away in there, so there's that. 

Week 7

Little bean. This week has been hard. I've already told you about my nausea, still a tough road on that front. Luckily though they make medicine that can help! Don't worry, it's safe. I've been taking it for a few days now and although it doesn't restore me 100% it is better. Im still nauseous but not throwing up quite so much. 

But the other reason it was hard was because on top of the sickness I started to get some emotional symptoms as well. I've actually never felt crazier. One minute I hate everyone, everyone around me is an idiot. I am grumpy and willing to unleash it on the closest poor soul. The next minute I'm in tears over some kittens in a commercial. Seriously, that actually happened. 

 Also I've been inexplicably blue. 

I have no reason to be sad baby bean. I am happy about your little being, I can't explain it but I'm having a hard time finding any joy in my day to day. I've been told this is normal, I can't see how. But I will wait it out and see. 

I swear the letters get more cheerful! What can I say, it was a rough start. 

Love, 

Jany