I have to be honest, turning 31 was much harder on me than turning 30. All those cliches we know and love about fearing the big 3-0 were definitely on my mind. Questions about past decisions, insecurities about how getting older will affect my physical body and the bubbling-up of many "what if's" to the surface. These were things that seemed to plague me leading up to this birthday.
31 is not THAT old - I realize this. Also I am not ungrateful. I have lived a truly blessed life, which up to this point has been full of overwhelming amounts of love and joy and very little pain. Yet I couldn't help but wonder ...Have I waited too long to have a child? Should I have sought a different career? Should I have made more of an effort in lost friendships? Or wasted less time in unproductive relationships?
It's hard to write those things down, listing your insecurities just isn't really fun is it? But I also want to this space to be a reflection of me.. even the not so great stuff. The point of it though is to say- how unbelievably wasteful it is to let those feelings get the better of you!
My birthday was spent enjoying the outdoors with my AMAZING husband, food, laughter, family and friends. By all accounts it was relatively mellow - but filled with so much love and support from those around me. As the day was winding down - all of those insecurities just felt really silly.
I have so much to be grateful for, and so much to look forward to - I'm just starting to realize that life isn't always a straight road and it won't always look like what you think it should - but even when it isn't perfect it can still be really beautiful. My life is pretty damn great.
Starting with my husband - This man, is just...ugh...you know?
Peter took me to a really pretty little bistro for lunch, it is a huge property with really pretty gardens, a cafe/bistro, a little shop - and a tree fort which of course he loved.
Peter found a grey "hare" in his soup. As the wife of a magician you get used to these kinds of things randomly appearing ... (cue disappearing joke).
The food/drink was great! Later we went to buy some pieces for my new office reno (which is coming along great by the way!) We enjoyed some tea with the in-laws, who gave me a pretty amazing gift - and I don't mean Peter :) They are the best in-laws anyone could ever hope for, extremely supportive and generous with their time and love. Plus really fun to hang out with!
In the evening my best friend and her husband took us out for really nice dinner, where I had the world's best Lobster linguini ... seriously, so good.
Overall just a wonderful day! Also, one of my b-day gifts was a new camera! What do you think of the pics? Its a Sony a6000 and I love it so far, I'll be testing it out pretty heavily over the next few weeks.